Thoughts on a birth

Sometimes births are exhausting. For everyone present. Mama has a hard time coping, needs a lot of hands-on care, and by the time baby has arrived, she is exhausted beyond anything she has known before. Physically, mentally, and for some emotionally. Those caring for her experience their own exhaustion from helping her through.

Sometimes births are smooth and easy. We call them "butter births". The entire process moves along with ease and without complication. Oftentimes they are pretty close to what you read in books about labor and birth.

Sometimes births are quick which can be a blessing and a curse. A blessing that it's over and the vast majority of babies who decided to come NOW have few complications. A curse because it. is. intense. Fast does not equal easy for all women. And then there is the factor as the midwife wondering if you will make it in time or if you'll be coaching a Daddy over the phone on how to catch his little one.

Sometimes births are full of energy. Everyone in the room radiates it. There are moments where it's toned down and you help the Mama focus through the intense bit at the end. Once the baby has arrived, the energy returns.

Then there are births like the one I had the honor to be at yesterday.

Sacred.

I arrived at her home after she had been laboring for about six hours. All morning I was nervous about making it to her house in time but she knew just when to call. As I entered their bedroom I could immediately feel the peace. The lights were turned down (not unusual). She was laboring in the pool with her husband holding her hand (not unusual). Beautiful music was playing softly (not unusual). But there was something about the energy in the room that I haven't felt at a birth in...well...I don't think ever.

Less than an hour later, a beautiful baby girl was born into my hands and was placed into her Mama's hands. Once we got her untangled from the cord, the two were comfortable in the pool, and I had done a quiet and gentle assessment of the baby, I stepped back.

In the quietness of the room with the music still playing, for the first time in a long time felt as if I was intruding on a sacred moment. My client quietly took in her new baby girl, smiled up at her husband who was still right next to her, and returned her gaze to the baby. She whispered to her. She cradled her. She had an energy about her that was addicting.

After a few minutes she said, "I've never been able to just hold my baby." And her husband agreed (speaking of the births of their other children), "We just watched them from the other side of the room."

That, my friends, is why I love this job.

I don't know if she expected those first moments to be as it was or if she expected me to be rubbing her baby clean, suctioning (if you're wondering, the baby cried very well immediately and did not require any suctioning), poking,...busy in HER space.

What I do know is that I am thankful she had those first moments. And I am honored to have been there and I am a better midwife because of it.